Brittany Cardwell is a standup comedian based in Brooklyn, New York. Her comedy has been described as confidently dumb and deceptively smart, and she’s ok with that. Brittany produces two weekly comedy shows—Ambush and Drule—and performs in clubs and festivals all over the city. Follow her on instagram @brittonuscardwell
My Joke of the Day:
This is my never-before-seen impression of every nu-metal band’s song lyrics ever written.
Most common Quarantine Activity:
Crying. I got really good at that, just finally had the time for it! Been putting pretty much all my effort this year into mastering my tears, so yeah I’m pretty good at it. Youtube tutorials to come.
Favorite quarantine show/movie:
Love Is Blind. I also watched a British dating show called Naked Attraction where you choose which person to date based only on the appearance of their genitals. It shows you their full genitals. I was watching this while at my parents’ place but I didn’t think they’d approve so I watched it in secret in my room on low volume, while telling myself “this isn’t porn.”
Favorite Instagram accounts
I only look at my own account, isn’t that what everyone does?
No, I love @miafaithhammond wtf is she doing she’s so funny, smash that like button.
Favorite quarantine meal and drink
Anything that could be consumed as a way of distracting myself from pain and problems is a fine meal for me! And between meals I can still distract myself by counting in my head by 5s (the best way to count) and that keeps things pretty under control.
Most Questionable thing you’ve seen or heard recently..
My mom is really proud of herself for negotiating the price of a placemat at a garage sale.
First thing you’ll do once isolation is over…
Sew all my masks together into some sick pants then pitch the design to Urban Outfitters. If they don’t like it, forget them.